Monday, Monday

Happy Monday! I normally don't look forward to Mondays because I feel so tired from the weekend, but I've had one of the most relaxing weekends and slept early last night so I'm feeling rejuvenated for this week. Today's especially special because there's a UCLA career fair in a few hours where they give us free stuff and one of my coworkers brought homemade chile rellenos to work. :)

I'm finally getting used to the daily grind of work. It's not as stressful anymore and I even find it enjoyable to be here. It's great not being the newbie anymore. We've been getting a lot of volunteers from UCLA next door and I've been assigned to interview and assign work to them. It's been so fun getting to know these collegians and it reminds me of when I used to volunteer at the Torrance Memorial Hospital when I was a senior in high school. It makes me want to help them even more because I know how helpful it was for me. The one bad thing is that I accept almost everyone I interview and now we have over twelve volunteers. Oops...They're all just too cute and sweet. :) 

Something that I've been hashing through recently: What it means to fight for joy.
I've heard this phrase thrown around so many times in sermons, conversations, etc but it wasn't until I really experienced circumstances where I needed to 'fight for joy' that this phrase actually became meaningful. I can't even describe the countless times I've fought back the heaviness of discouragement or weariness. The terms "Hope in God" "Look to Jesus" were so central in our way of thinking and talking in our Christian community, yet I still struggled to foster a continuous heart of joy. Because my external circumstances were oppressing and my internal emotional condition was weary, my perspective to fight for joy was disheveled: I didn't see a purpose to even fight if I was bound to feel this way again.

After many months I came to the remarkable thought that there will never be a moment where I won't need to "fight for joy." How is this awesome...? Because fighting for this joy in Christ means constantly meditating and thinking about Jesus to the point where our thoughts and actions become shaped by God. It means being so saturated in Jesus and in the Word that all our earthly problems decrease and Christ increases. I see this in pastors at my church, in my dad, even in psalmists in the Bible. Their approach to hardships reveal much about their relationship with God-how even in the midst of tribulation, their hearts are directed towards Jesus with an overflow of praise. It's amazing to see the transformation of our thoughts about life,  emotions, burdens and cares when we are fixed upon Jesus.

I'm getting so much work done right now... Haha. Probably should go take a break now. ;)

Sleepless in Seattle

Good morning! It's 12:37 am and I can't sleep. I'm assuming it's because I'm traveling to Seattle tomorrow morning! I can never sleep the night before I travel. Probably a combination of excitement, worry, and exhaustion. I definitely have a mild case of travel anxiety... Besides not being able to sleep, I am super excited to be able to travel with my roomies who haven't even packed yet! W00t~

Anyway a quick thought before I sleep. If I can describe the past month in one word it would be: 'Waiting.' I realized after I graduated, I am constantly waiting for something new to happen. New job? Different direction in ministry? Relationships? It makes me so eager to want to know my future. At the same time though it made me think of why God has allowed so much of our lives to be consumed by waiting. I'm seeing how much God values the fruit produced in the soul that learns to wait patiently for him. He takes pains to cultivate this in us. Such pains only lead us to gain trust and dependence in our Lord and produces hope as He never fails us and His promises remain secure. I am thankful that I can learn to trust God's promises as it is really developing my capacity to hope in eternal life. Practicing every day not to trust in my perceptions and emotions but on His promises.

I should probably try to sleep now. Sigh. I think another reason I can't sleep is because Matt is still up studying for his last final tomorrow. Wish I had something to study so I can stay up with him. Can't believe I'm saying this, but I really do miss college finals week. There really is nothing like staying up with your friends all night and... studying. HAHA. Okay I really must be tired.
This is Matt trying to frown but failing hardcore... And I just look like Squidward. Yay.

So proud of this good lookin' feller. 

Seriously contemplating on whether to watch "Sleepless in Seattle" or not. Title is kind of ironic... I love Meg Ryan. And Tom Hanks and Seattle! But mostly SLEEP! ><

Good night!

Milk Teeth

It's nearly the end of October. This means that Christmas is near. Yay!! Honestly, it's sad that Thanksgiving is neglected every year. That happens when you're shadowed by Christmas. Don't get me wrong. I love Thanksgiving. It's the only holiday that's not tied to excessive commercialism and expensive gift giving. And there's something special about gathering those we care about most so that we can all feast together and enjoy each other's company. Although I do enjoy Thanksgiving, can't deny that Christmas is my favorite holiday. :)

I am currently at a coffee, tea, and boba place in LA. I drove down spontaneously from Irvine to see my mom who's flying in from Korea tonight. I've missed her so much. I downloaded Kakao again just so I can talk and chat with her. I've already sent her 18 messages and still no reply after 2 weeks... Sigh. I just like to think she or someone else out there is reading my messages.

Anyway, I've been trying to cut down on buying drinks. Iced teas, coffees, milk teas, smoothies... It's become a habit to purchase some kind of drink to have with me while I study. You would think it's harmless but then at the end of the month you look back on where all your money went and where the excessive weight gain is coming from. ICED DRINKS, I tell you! Milk teas in particular... Very deceiving. This is often brought up to my attention by Matt who's in dental school now and who has recently held more concern and interest regarding the health of my teeth. Hahaha. Apparently a regular sized milk tea boba drink is 38 grams of sugar which is equivalent to nearly 3 tablespoons of sugar. (Minus the carbohydrates.) I guess I can see how damaging that can be to your teeth. I've associated milk tea and teeth together so that when I hear one I automatically think of the other. Milk teeeeth. Sigh... failed.

So here I am, ironically in a milk tea and coffee shop, writing this post, and feeling sad that I can't drink more boba. So then instead... we got Blockheads shaved ice right next door. :)        

Artichoke looking shaved ice! This was delicious. And the price of one boba. Good deals=good meals.

Green tea and black sesame. SO GOOD! Thank you!

Taking some of LA back with me. Go Bruins!... hehe. zot zot. :)

Today was a good day. Good day ya'll!

Praying my IOU'S

A quick blog post before my next class in thirty minutes.

I have to admit, I don’t finish books that often. I start a lot of them, but don’t finish many. And although I am easily moved and convicted by the things I read, rarely do I consistently practice them.

But here is something I read in one of Piper’s books called “When I Don’t Desire God: How to Fight for Joy” that I’ve actually found extremely  helpful and something I practice on a normal basis. 

I was reminded of it once again as I found myself not starting the morning with God. I was about to dive into the daily grind as I normally do, rather than spend a few quiet moments with Him in the word and prayer. But gladly the Spirit won. May it help and bless you as it has for me. 

Before having a devotional, this is what I pray…

I – Incline my heart.

“The first thing my soul needs is an inclination toward God and His Word. I must want to know God and read His word and draw near to him…Very simply, we ask God to take our hearts, which are more inclined to breakfast and the newspaper, and change that inclination.We are asking God to create desires that are not there.”

Incline my heart to your testimonies, and  not to selfish gain! -Psalm 119:18

O- Open the eyes of my heart.

“I need to have the eyes of my heart opened so that when my inclination leads me to the Word, I see what is really there, and not just my own ideas.”

Open my eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of your law.  -Psalm 119:18
Open the eyes of my heart, O Lord, to see what it says about you as wonderful.

U- Unite my heart.

“My heart is badly fragmented. Parts of it are inclined, and part of it are not…What I long for is a united heart where all the parts say a joyful YES! to what God reveals in His word.

Unite my heart to fear your name. -Psalm 86:11
His delight shall be in the fear of the LORD. -Isaiah 11:3

S- Satisfy me.

“What I really want from all this engagement with the Word of God and the work of his Spirit in answer to my prayer is for my heart to be satisfied with God and not with the world.”

Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days. -Psalm 90:14

To all the people out there who are struggling to find joy in the Lord, or not finding joy in life period….let’s take a moment to go back to the source of joy. Let’s pray our IOU’S, and wait in expectation as God opens the flood gates of joy from His Word and Spirit into our lives!

Material taken from: Piper, John. When I Don’t Desire God, pg 151-152.

Juicey

Already heading into week 3 of my last quarter at UCI. Don't know how to feel at this point. Basically... nearly everything I'm doing is and may be my last. Like walking to classes and having classes with my roommates or taking courses at my favorite lecture hall SSLH 100 and then grudgingly walking from SSLH all the way to the opposite side of the campus towards BS3 where my next class is. Little things I take for granted right now but know I will miss come January when I'm no longer an Anteater. Thankfully I'll still be here so I guess I'll still feel like a college student.
Well speaking of classes with my roomies... the other day we passed by Nektar- a delicious organic juice bar that just opened up right by our apartment- and we were like "Oh let's get some Nektar!!!" But then we were all sad because it was like $5...
So we went back to our apartment and made our own NEKTAR and we made it for FREE. Huehuehue

juicy juice ^_^ Don't mind the one on the right please. Her mam pays me to take care of her. 

Life Lately

Suilad! I just finished my online final for summer session II. Finally free for two weeks. :) Lately I've been really enjoying my time at home and going out here and there; meeting up with old friends and new ones. I've finally learned the secret of how to live at home with peace and harmony: Wake up early, keep my room clean, hang out with my parents occasionally, and don't use too much gas. Hahaha. I've been living at home the latter half of the summer. I knew beforehand that there could potentially be some kind of clash between me and my parents. I guess this is only natural since I've gotten a taste of independence and never really being told what to do back in Irvine. So before moving back home for a few months, I told myself that I wanted the next few months to be as harmonious as possible. And so I quickly tried getting used to living back at home again with rules and curfews and chores and other offspring duties... 

Surprisingly, it's been so wonderful! I don't think I've had any clashes with my parents or siblings... Yet. Haha. It's either because I've been a very good daughter... or that my parents have been showing a lottt of grace. I think it's the first one :) Hehehe. I didn't realize how much I love being at home and how much I value time spent with my family. Definitely need to cherish these times!

Lately getting really into scrapbooking again. I finally have time to do my college scrapbook. The other day, Matt and I printed nearly 200 photos. Yay for 10cent photos at Walgreens!

Decorated his new room at UCLA so he wouldn't have just teeth to look at. =) 

This past weekend was June Lee's surprise baby shower! Can't wait to meet you Abigail <3 

I was also just on tumblr and tumbled upon a cool quote from the author of The Hobbit. Thanks for this Tolkien. :')

Time to help my mother make curry for dinner! As the elves would say... Navaer! <3

napo'o 'ana o ka la

Okay firstly why is the word "sunset" so long in Hawaiian??? Bahaha.

Greetings from Kaua'i. :)
It's already our fourth day here. I'm really enjoying this island. It's known to be the "Garden Island" and I definitely see why they call it that. Everywhere I look is mountains of endless green. The island is draped in vast valleys, sharp mountain spires, tropical rainforests, rivers and waterfalls. And then there's the beautiful ocean right in the middle of it. I don't think I've been in a place so calming and scenic.

Today we visited Calvary Chapel in the village about thirty minutes away. It was a different feeling entering in as visitors instead of regular attendees but it was a good experience nonetheless. It didn't help much that we were the only Asians in the small building. We totally stood out.. In the beginning of the service the pastor called a graduating senior to the front so the whole church could pray for her. She was to go to college in Pennsylvania within the next few weeks. In his prayer he said, "God, please be with her and guide her in the States as it is so loud and foreign especially to us here in Kauai." I heard that and I was a little thrown off. In my mind I was thinking, "The States is where real life is at!! That's where she'll gain the true college experience!" And then it hit me that life is extremely different here in Kauai and from what I'm used to. It's louder, busier, and more complicated back in the States. There's so much to attend to, places to go, things to see (on a phone...) that it's easy to get consumed in everything. The pastor's prayer spoke loud to me and I started to really care for this girl I didn't even know. It made me realize that whether I'm back in the States or here in Kauai, how important it is to find time in the craziness of day to be in the stillness of the Lord's presence and know that he is our God and that is He is so so so good. :)

Afterwards we visited a few waterfalls and then got some yummy shaved ice. :) 

Next to us is a crazy waterfall and below us is a really wide river...!

my favorite HAWAIIAN SHAVED ICE :D 

It's so nice waking up to this every morning :)

Aloha kakou <3